Survivors Stories

Published on: August 27, 2010

My name is Dashanda and I am a burn survivor (Part One)

My mother moved our family to New York in search of a better life. It was stressful living in New York, We had to go to a shelter to find a place to stay. Seeing my mother struggle was really hard for me and my brothers and sisters. My mother has six kids, with me and my twin brother being the oldest. We never really understood why my mother left Georgia, and we never asked. Our very first apartment in Brooklyn was not what we were use to. It was only a one bedroom apartment. I had to share a room with my brothers and sisters. We had been in the apartment for about a month when this accident happened. August 14, 2004 will always stay in my mind as a reminder. My mother wanted to cook Sunday dinner for the family. She was boiling chicken on the stove. We were straightening up the house so that we could play afterwards. My little brother and I were told to clean the kitchen. While cleaning I opened the oven door and all I remember is the stove tilting forward and the pot with the boiling water sliding towards me. I fell on the floor along with the pot that fell on me. The water was very hot! As soon as it hit my skin I was screaming. I ran out of the kitchen and into the living room. All I could do was cry and scream. My mother called 911. They told her to put me in the tub and run cold water. Sitting there I was wondering why this just happened to me. Crying and shivering at the same time I heard the fire trucks and the police in front of my building. When they arrived upstairs they took me out of the cold water and then put me into a chair. My skin was wrinkled in certain places where I knew that I was burned. I remember telling the firefighters that I didn’t want to die, I was crying for help.

Published on: August 12, 2010

Setting Goals

By Larry Kramer

After a burn injury many survivors think that it’s the end of the world and that all hope is lost. They think that they will never be able to live a normal life again. Setting goals is important as it will help the survivor to return back to the society and living a normal life again. A survivor should start by setting goals that are achievable and are not too hard and not too easy to achieve. Start with the easy goals and take small steps, one at a time. These steps will build up and you will be amazed later at what you have achieved. Have a plan to achieve the goals and don’t let setbacks prevent you from progressing. Reward yourself after accomplishing a goal no matter how small the goal was. Continuously assess the progress you are making toward achieving each goal and see what steps are needed to reach your next plateau. After achieving each goal you will feel empowered and this will create positive feedback and enhance self esteem. With time you will see and feel the power of accomplishment and how this will speed up your recovery.

Published on: August 6, 2010

Survivor Story

By Larry Kramer

From the book “I will not be broken” by Jerry White.

Survivor X was disabled during the civil war that took place in 1978 in Eritrea. In the beginning he was saying “Now my legs are injured, what is going to happen to me?” But this didn’t keep him down. He quickly got rid of these thoughts because he realized what happened to him, has happened already and he can’t change the past. He stopped thinking about what happened to him and instead started thinking about what he can do. He started thinking about going back to work and taking control of his life, because if he doesn’t do that, nobody is going to do it for him. All the bad thoughts that were in his mind were gradually diminishing until they were completely gone.

He now takes care of his elderly mother, and helps cultivate the land for elderly and challenged people in his area. In return for working their land, he shares the produce with them and also get to keep a share for himself. Survivor X doesn’t see himself as a challenged person because he was able to work and give back.

Published on: August 5, 2010

Everything is Possible

By Larry Kramer

There is a purpose in life for every person and no matter what happens in life, every person has to dust him/herself off and stand on his/her feet. It may not be easy in the beginning with all the physical and emotional trauma associated with burn injuries but no matter what you are going through, it won’t last forever and you can choose a fresh start whenever you decide to. So it’s your decision to change your life and start living your life again. Don’t stick to the past, live for today. The good old days will not return again but the days ahead of you may be better than these old days.
The important thing after a burn injury is that you are still alive and you can rebuild your life. Set a goal and don’t let the pain from the injury set you back from accomplishing your goals and dreams. Don’t let negative thoughts seep into your mind because they will have a negative effect on you and will pull you backwards. When you are in pain, reach out to friends and family as they may be able to help. Make the best of each day in your life and leave the past to the past. Fight back with a positive attitude and a strong will.

Published on: August 3, 2010

From “Survivor Corps”

By Larry Kramer

Survivor X was living with his wife and two daughters and supporting them by working as an administrator when civil war erupted in Ethiopia. Everyone was asked by the government to fight even those without military training. Survivor X went to fight and while he was on patrol, he was beaten badly and shot thirteen times by revolutionaries. As a result he lost his arm all the way to the shoulder and nearly bled to death. The survivor recalls that the nurses didn’t dress his wound as they thought that he wouldn’t survive, they just were watching him die, but he survived. When he returned home, his wife told him that because he was an amputee, she couldn’t live with him anymore and left him taking their youngest daughter with her. He was soon living on the streets because his savings were confiscated when a new government took over in Ethiopia.

Despite what he has gone through from hunger, disrespect, constant abuse and fatigue, he didn’t give up. He was told about survivor corps by another war survivor he met. The survivor joined a support group for survivors and got connected with one of the partners of Survivor Corp to receive financing and training to operate a small business selling dry goods from a kiosk. The survivor with this business was able to rebuild his life; he says “I became strong emotionally and psychologically. My income also increased. I started to live independently. I respect myself, and now, others respect me as well.” The survivor now peaks with people without disabilities telling them not to judge people with disabilities without knowing them, they are just like people without disabilities.

Published on: July 28, 2010

Survivor Story

By Larry Kramer

From burn survivors throughout the world

Survivor X was living happily with his wife and his three boys. On one day in May while he was alone at home, he was trying to clean his yard and garage from the litter that had accumulated during the winter. He lived in a rural area that allowed to incinerators to burn trash. He started a fire with trash from the yard and as he started to clean the garage, he collected boxes and papers and placed them in the fire for destruction, there were several empty oil containers, somehow he picked a full container of injector cleaner and as he placed it in the incinerator it exploded in his face.

He remembers seeing the skin melt from his fingers as he was trying to put down the fire from his face. When the fire was out, he went inside the house and called 911, they arrived after 5-10 minutes. He was taken by an ambulance were he passed out. In August he was brought out of the drug induced coma and he was allowed to go home at the end of September.

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Published on: July 23, 2010

Choose Life

By Larry Kramer

From the book I Will Not Be Broken by Jerry White.

After a major trauma, many think that it’s the end of the world, that everything has gone and that there is no point of living anymore. Life will continue. Choosing life means trying to forget about the past and deciding that you will not to be held hostage. Life has many good things to offer and all bad things will be memories. Willing to try, thinking positively and looking always forward toward the future will give you the strength to move forward. Taking small steps at a time are key and results will be amazing. Every survivor can be an inspiration to others of what can be accomplished if you set your mind to it and never give up. Most burn survivors can return to a productive and healthy life.

A woman whose husband was disabled in a civil war, as he was trying to help a fellow friend, although living in extreme poverty, and her husband’s difficulty finding work, still she sees that they are living a happy life. She says “I am here living. We are missing a lot of things, yes, but we can live like that.. What belongs to love is love and whatever this poverty in our house, we are living according to our means with our three children here at home”.

Published on: July 14, 2010

Face Facts

By Larry Kramer

From the book “I Will Not Be Broken” by Jerry White

No matter what trauma you are exposed to, you have to face the fact that it happened, that it is in the past and you can’t change it but what can be change is the future.

When the writer was in the hospital after losing his right leg in a landmine explosion, when he had to wheel himself down to the lunch hall during the recovery time, at the beginning he didn’t appreciate that he was the one who is doing that. He would think to himself “don’t they see the bloody stump?”. But he did it and wheeled himself. When he reached the lunch hall he met a lot of people who were exposed to a different kind of trauma. He remembers an old guy who had been in the hospital for months going through rehabilitation having a prosthesis above his knee, telling him “don’t worry you’ll have your own fake leg one day”. These people helped him to get through a very difficult time.

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Published on: July 13, 2010

Reaching Out

By Larry Kramer

From the book I Will Not Be Broken by Jerry White.

Humans are social in nature and can’t survive without communication and socializing with others. Some people isolate themselves and retreat into a shell after being exposed to trauma thinking that they are protecting themselves. Reaching out to others and finding people who can understand what you are going through is essential. Surprisingly strangers that we don’t know can be of great help and support to us while people we are close to may disappoint us. There will always be people who are willing to help and support us and they are always there when we need them.

The writer benefited a lot from social support while he was in the hospital in Israel after stepping on a landmine. This accident led him to lose one of his legs; he said “with so many people coming and going, it was clear that social support-a primary integrant for overcoming crises-was not missing from my life”. Most survivors’ testimonies that the writer interviewed were “I would never have made it through without my family. They saved me during the darkest moments. I am closer to my family now, after my accident, than before”.

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Published on: July 9, 2010

Escaping Victimhood

By Larry Kramer

From the book I Will Not Be Broken by Jerry white.

Some people stay victims which is a type of defense mechanism that follows trauma. Sympathy is welcomed at time of need but some people continue to invite that sympathy because it is comfortable. Every survivor eventually has to take responsibility for his/her life and break this habit of victimhood.

Saying things like “if only I return back to the past to make this right” or “if I didn’t drive the car on that time”, if only so and so hadn’t happen and so on will not change anything and will keep you attached to thoughts that will pull you in the darkness of the past. People who can’t let go of their Victimhood will not be able to think positively, take positive actions or relate in a healthy way to others. They will not participate in daily life in an effective way.

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